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Tried my hand at poetry and... http://wwww.one-ring.co.uk/viewtopic.php?f=39&t=14622 |
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Author: | Captain Ingold [ Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:32 pm ] |
Post subject: | Tried my hand at poetry and... |
Ok, so it was homework. You have to admit though, its not bad. I could write a series or something... Spain - The Cross-roads of the World [spoiler] Spain, that land where cultures cross, religions meet and two seas toss. People travel there for heat and sun, unaware of its rich past… First the Celts moved down from Gaul, and called the land Iberia. They were followed by Greeks, who came from afar, the land of Peloponnesia. Phoenicians fled from Tyre, arrived in Spain and called it theirs. Romans drove them off and claimed it, built bridges, some still stand today. But neither ruled the people’s hearts. Then Rome fell and the Vandals came; a people who had ever roamed, Soon they too were forced to leave as the Visigoths found their home. But Berbers came from Africa, across the sea to Andalus. They forced the Christians to the hills, and after wars they lived in peace. A soldier of the final king Rodriguez, with followers lived in the mountain peaks. They bided their time, waiting for their moment to come, to avenge their fallen comrades. One day they charged out from the hills, slew their long-time Moorish foes. They called Spain theirs - as it once was, and built castles in the north. For centuries the war went on, neither had a foothold. Spain in two - north and south, split in many kingdoms. Castile, Léon, Aragon, the largest of the Christian realms; Granada, Seville, Cordoba, the taifas of the Muslims. In 1043 there came to be, a noble’s child from Vivar. His name was Rodriguez Díaz. He served his king in war and earned the title “El Cíd” - The Hero. El Cíd swore loyalty to the king, though now his jealous son Alfonso. Envious courtiers put rumours in the king’s ears and soon Rodriguez was dismissed. The Cíd still served the king, a noble man, the rightful thing. He conquered lands and governed cities, but gave it all to his vain master. Eventually the king relented and called him back, but it was too late. The Moors had called on the Almoravids, fanatics from the desert. They landed in Valencia, and with their massive horde looked to take Iberia. In the first combat the Spaniards won, or some it seemed to start, But as the horsemen back they rode, El Cíd was struck by a Moorish dart. The poison did its task, and alas! Rodriguez was close to death. But his clever wife had a plan, and soon he was mounted again. The Muslims cheered their victory - they’d slain the Spanish hero, When the gates opened and out he came, with unknowing warriors at his back. The Moors fled from this demi-god, who’d escaped death and now wreaked revenge. And so in death El Cíd saved Spain, and started a string of victories. Within three hundred years Iberia was theirs, and the war was finally ended. That land of war, of faith, of culture; united. Spain - where peoples meet, no more a land divided. [/spoiler] |
Author: | Uruk-Hai Stealth Bomber [ Mon Mar 30, 2009 10:43 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
nice... so El Cid's wife rode out wearing his armor? EDIT: Or his son Alphonso? It's a bit long for poetry.... |
Author: | Captain Ingold [ Tue Mar 31, 2009 4:25 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
No, They put El Cíd's armour on him even though he was dead, and put him on his horse Babieca. It scared off the Moors. |
Author: | Dorthonion [ Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:45 pm ] |
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Charlton Ben Hur Heston.... |
Author: | Captain Ingold [ Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:52 pm ] |
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Dorth, I have never seen an El Cíd film, or Ben Hur. I got this from an Italian 1960's book, "El Cíd: Soldier and Hero." |
Author: | Corsair [ Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:44 pm ] |
Post subject: | Re: Tried my hand at poetry and... |
Captain Ingold wrote: Spain - The Cross-roads of the World Spain, that land where cultures cross, religions meet and two seas toss. People travel there for heat and sun, unaware of its rich past… First the Celts moved down from Gaul, and called the land Iberia. They were followed by Greeks, who came from afar, the land of Peloponnesia. Just where I underlined it. I would replace the 3 full stops with nothing. This use of enjambment would fit it well because it would speed up the poem, representing the continuous flow / movement of 'the celts moving down from gaul' Just an idea XD Corsair |
Author: | Captain Ingold [ Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:25 pm ] |
Post subject: | |
I was kind of going for the introduction effect more, wanted to a prologue/prelude to the poem for those ignorant of Hispania's glorious past. |
Author: | gaarew [ Wed Apr 01, 2009 6:05 am ] |
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What about the iambic pentameter? |
Author: | Corsair [ Wed Apr 01, 2009 3:31 pm ] |
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gaarew wrote: What about the iambic pentameter?
hehe I am partly to blame here |
Author: | Dorthonion [ Wed Apr 01, 2009 6:59 pm ] |
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I think it iambled off... |
Author: | Captain Ingold [ Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:29 pm ] |
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*Acts like upper-class, snobbish, professional literary Critic* And here you can see the iambling dodecameter... where's that Dorthogrophy gone... and the use of, um, 3 full stops, to um, bring it to a full stop. *Stops acting long enough to break out in laughter* |
Author: | gaarew [ Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:33 pm ] |
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Captain Ingold wrote: and the use of, um, 3 full stops, to um, bring it to a full stop.
You mean ellipses... Or, in this context, aposiopesis... |
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