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 Post subject: DISASTER STRIKES
PostPosted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 12:31 pm 
Kinsman
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hey everyone
after not touching the paints for over a year or so, i decided to get my models back out, i went in to the loft AND . . . THEY WERE GONE!!!!
i have no idea where they could be, ive searched the house from high to low and, nothing :sad:
what should i DOOOOOOOO

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 Post subject: Re: DISASTER STRIKES
PostPosted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 2:36 pm 
Elven Warrior
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Fall of Fingolfin wrote:
hey everyone
after not touching the paints for over a year or so, i decided to get my models back out, i went in to the loft AND . . . THEY WERE GONE!!!!
i have no idea where they could be, ive searched the house from high to low and, nothing :sad:
what should i DOOOOOOOO

That's absolutely horrible. But I'm sure you'll find them in some obvious place you forgot. :wink:

Rueben

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 3:12 pm 
Elven Warrior
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Location: Hear the sinister whisper of steel on leather? The quiet footsteps? You've found me.
Step 1: Have a panic attack. Scream, run around, yank hair out etc. Most important step, be sure to do it GOOD

Step 2: Hypverventilate. Sit down on couch and regain breath. If necessary mug passing mail carrier for paper bag.

Step 3: Sit down and think, very, very, very, very, very, very carefully to yourself a year ago. Think of how much clumsier and more foolish you were then. Realize you may very well have not thought a year ago that underneath your second cousin's uncle's brother's nephew's great-grandfather's bed was a bad place to store your miniatures.

Step 4: On the same line of thought, realize that, a year ago, you may have very well thought it was great fun to torch your miniatures. You got mad at them, got a blowtorch and some lighter fluid, and recreated the first Nuclear missile test. You then proceeded to (legally) hijack a passerby's banana seat Harley motorbike and go flying down the highway, little pink and yellow streamers fluttering violently from the treadplate pattern rubber grips. You then collided at unnerving speed with a large, shiny 18-wheeler, went flying over the guardrail, and connected violently with a large and surprisingly secure lightpole. Falling to the ground you then proceeded to challenge the sidewalk to a headbutting contest, which you still consider yourself the winner of. The resultant lump resulted in memory loss, and here you are now a year later, trying to figure out what happened to your miniatures.

Out,
-Anduril, world reknowned consultant. Famous for his sharp look in a straightjacket.

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 4:56 pm 
Kinsman
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Anduril Blade of Kings wrote:
Step 1: Have a panic attack. Scream, run around, yank hair out etc. Most important step, be sure to do it GOOD

Step 2: Hypverventilate. Sit down on couch and regain breath. If necessary mug passing mail carrier for paper bag.

Step 3: Sit down and think, very, very, very, very, very, very carefully to yourself a year ago. Think of how much clumsier and more foolish you were then. Realize you may very well have not thought a year ago that underneath your second cousin's uncle's brother's nephew's great-grandfather's bed was a bad place to store your miniatures.

Step 4: On the same line of thought, realize that, a year ago, you may have very well thought it was great fun to torch your miniatures. You got mad at them, got a blowtorch and some lighter fluid, and recreated the first Nuclear missile test. You then proceeded to (legally) hijack a passerby's banana seat Harley motorbike and go flying down the highway, little pink and yellow streamers fluttering violently from the treadplate pattern rubber grips. You then collided at unnerving speed with a large, shiny 18-wheeler, went flying over the guardrail, and connected violently with a large and surprisingly secure lightpole. Falling to the ground you then proceeded to challenge the sidewalk to a headbutting contest, which you still consider yourself the winner of. The resultant lump resulted in memory loss, and here you are now a year later, trying to figure out what happened to your miniatures.

Out,
-Anduril, world reknowned consultant. Famous for his sharp look in a straightjacket.


This. Step 4 was epic.

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 24, 2010 5:14 pm 
Elven Warrior
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Well, nothing mcu hwe can help you with. Just have a good look around your house ask your parents/girlfriend if they have seen them or moved them and if not...well I don't want to think about it.

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PostPosted: Sun Jul 25, 2010 12:34 am 
Craftsman
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Anduril Blade of Kings wrote:
Step 1: Have a panic attack. Scream, run around, yank hair out etc. Most important step, be sure to do it GOOD

Step 2: Hypverventilate. Sit down on couch and regain breath. If necessary mug passing mail carrier for paper bag.

Step 3: Sit down and think, very, very, very, very, very, very carefully to yourself a year ago. Think of how much clumsier and more foolish you were then. Realize you may very well have not thought a year ago that underneath your second cousin's uncle's brother's nephew's great-grandfather's bed was a bad place to store your miniatures.

Step 4: On the same line of thought, realize that, a year ago, you may have very well thought it was great fun to torch your miniatures. You got mad at them, got a blowtorch and some lighter fluid, and recreated the first Nuclear missile test. You then proceeded to (legally) hijack a passerby's banana seat Harley motorbike and go flying down the highway, little pink and yellow streamers fluttering violently from the treadplate pattern rubber grips. You then collided at unnerving speed with a large, shiny 18-wheeler, went flying over the guardrail, and connected violently with a large and surprisingly secure lightpole. Falling to the ground you then proceeded to challenge the sidewalk to a headbutting contest, which you still consider yourself the winner of. The resultant lump resulted in memory loss, and here you are now a year later, trying to figure out what happened to your miniatures.

Out,
-Anduril, world reknowned consultant. Famous for his sharp look in a straightjacket.


Bahahahahaaaaaa :lol:

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PostPosted: Sat Jul 31, 2010 8:15 pm 
Elven Warrior
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After carefully review and scrutiny of your case, I can agree with complete certainty on the hypothesis set forth by my colleague, Anduril. His logic is sound, as is his reasoning. After running through some numbers and calculating the statistical probability of each possible outcome, I would like to further the research of said colleague, in the hope that your dilemma be resolved as soon as possible. These are the results:

Outcome n# 1: Your panic attack leads you to punch the wall in your loft, which gives way. All of a sudden, a massive colony of hoarder cockroaches scuttle out of the wall, revealing a pile of miniatures covered in insect feces: 18.445% probable.

Outcome n# 2: You pass out from hyperventilation and wake up on the ground next to the desk in your loft, and notice the miniatures conveniently placed under the desk: 2.01% probable.

Outcome n# 3: You find them intact and gaining dust underneath your second cousin's uncle's brother's nephew's great-grandfather's bed: 5.99% probable.

Outcome n# 4: You discover medical records dated from a year ago depicting a lump the size of a baseball on your occipital lobe, as well as a fine for grand theft auto and reckless driving. You use these clues to conduct an investigation which ultimately leads to the discovery of a sizeable lump of molten plastic in a corner of the loft: 73.555% probable.

Best of luck,

-RoG, equally world renowned consultant. Famous for his sharp look in a banana peel dress.

For queries or employment opportunities, please contact:

Anduril & RoG Consulting Co.
42 Wallaby Way, Sydney
Asylum Block 3
Ask for detainee 354 or 866.

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PostPosted: Sun Aug 01, 2010 6:49 pm 
Loremaster
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:lol: :rofl: These are the two funniest posts I've read in all the 146 I have been slogging through from the last week. :lol: 8)
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PostPosted: Sun Aug 01, 2010 7:46 pm 
Loremaster
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hehe this thread is a good laugh.. :lol: I wonder if he has found them, using these professional methods of course. 8)
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PostPosted: Sun Aug 01, 2010 7:54 pm 
Elven Warrior
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I hope I didn't waste my time on a witty reply for nothing :(

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